~Not The One~

1. Ever since their first met, as she lied her eyes on him and he laid his on hers too, they were sure that there was a chemistry between them. The relationship started and all went well. But, he is just not the one for her or so she thought. One fine day, she ended everything up. And somebody was hurt.

2. They got to know each other through a mutual friend. She had a crushed on one of his friends. Her crushed went dating with one of her close girlfriends instead *ouch*.
The guy liked her and told their other friends. Asking them to found out how she felt towards him. Soon, she heard about it and indirectly agreed to be with him. A confession was made and they became an item. Something had happened and she could not take it much longer. She wanted to end it up but had no gut to do so, afraid she might hurt him. Her supposed crush (a.k.a her boyfriend's friend) helped her out by typing a message for her boyfriend using her mobile phone, asking for a break up. She read the message and pressed the "send" button. There was no replied. A few days had passed, she got a message from her boyfriend (who was supposed to be her ex). The message awkwardly stated that he wanted to break up with her. She got confused as she thought it was already over. But, didn't want to make things more complicated than it already was she replied the message saying it was ok and that's alright for her. A few months later she heard that he made rumors about her! Saying that she has another guy while dating him and the worst is, he said that she already slept with a guy *what the hell!*
Later on she found out that she actually hurt his ego. Fact has it that when he asked her for a break up, his best friend was doing the same thing. His best friend's girlfriend was so screwed up and pleaded not to break up while his own girlfriend agreed without a hesitation! Now she knows that, once in her lifetime (wish it will never happen again), she was dating A JERK. Up to now, he believes that he's the one who asked for the break up. She could not care less.

3. Her school girlfriends asked her out to a theme park. They took a public transportation and made one stop along the journey. That was when she was introduced to him. They had fun at the theme park. They did exchange phone numbers and kept contact for a week or so. But then, for some reasons, they (SHOULD) lost contact. 10 months after their first met, they chatted for hours via msn. This became their ritual almost every single night. Until one day they decided to meet up again. He asked her to be his girl. At first, she was afraid to start a new relationship. She stuck in a situation where she couldn't say no, thinking that he was so nice and all that. Yes was the answered. She thought that she could love him as the time goes by. She tried and perhaps she was right. But, she chose to kept their relationship as a secret from others as she didn't want her school girlfriends to make a fuss about it. He is not a bad-looking guy, very clever, and most importantly he made her felt that she was loved. Too bad, he went to another country to pursue his study. Long distance relationship they were in. The troubles began. She was closed with one guy from her school, the one who said that he liked her best friend, and she believed it. That was why they got closed at the first place. Little did she know, that the guy from her school was liking her instead. Every time she would hang out with the guy from her school, she would tell her boyfriend where they would go, what they would do, who would come along and what time she would be back. Simply everything. She knew that her boyfriend was reluctant to let her hang out with the guy from her school. But, on the other hand, she really wanted to help this guy to be with her friend. Rumor sparked at her school, saying that she was in a relationship with the guy. Her boyfriend kept asking her about it and she kept trying to tell him that that was not true! Later on, the rumor spread uncontrollable. All thanks to the school-girls who were oh-i-know-it-all (and think that everything they know is right) kind of people..geez! She was so fed up! Everything seemed a mess for her. To top it all, her boyfriend showed that he distrusted her. He said that his friend told him that he saw her with another guy and many more. She had enough! She chose to break up, thought it might be the best for them. They remain friends. She keeps thinking that maybe one day she will regret to break up with him. Just maybe...

4. After so many phone calls.
Countless text messages.
She has the feeling that they are going no where.
She will see.. He will see..
Nobody knows what will they be..
A new lover? or friends forever?


~Jadi biarkan hatimu menemukan sendiri cinta senjatinya~

~Melbourne~

It's raining cats and dogs today.

The symphony of rain immersed me into a sentimental mood. Waking the melancholic up from my inner-self and letting the sanguine in me go to rest for a little while. *yea, gue melankolis-sanguin. kontras emang.tapi ga penting*

Every time people ask me whether I like to be where I am now, I would definitely say yes. It's so obvious that I have nothing to do here, except having fun. *I consider watching movies, hang out, cafes, relaxing at home whenever I want is FUN. What do you think? Boredom?*

I haven't pursued my study yet and am unemployed at the moment. But, that's okay for me though. I have my family here with me, as well as my friends. Most importantly, I can be with the one whom I adore the most..Poppy. Being able to be with her every single day it's what I've been longing for for the past 5 years.*that's how important she is to me*

However, if there is one thing I never been good in, it's pretending that I don't miss Melbourne. I miss it heaps. But, no. I never miss-it-like-CRAZY. Perhaps, deep inside, I would not allow myself to.

For me, allowing myself missing something very deeply is like letting my heart to be in pain and would not be able to do anything but cry.

The one thing I'm afraid of is separation. Not every separations, only the ones when I would be away from people/some things/places which I heart deeply...be it for a long or short time. And vice versa.. Knowing that I would miss those people, places and everything I used to do for a period of time. It scares me.

For example, if you have a crush on someone, and that particular someone is away from you (perhaps he/she lives in a different island/state) and there is a situation (usually at night) where you suddenly miss him/her SO MUCH. Don't you think it hurts?

Miss does hurt a lot.
Got what I mean?
But still, some times you couldn't help it when that feeling struck you hard.
Feeling is one of the many things you couldn't control.

I miss Melbourne and here are some pictures which I took a few months ago when I was still there =)

Start with some Melbourne-street-musicians *bahasa Indonya PENGAMEN..tp pengamen sana keren bo!*















*If I'm not mistaken, he's a japanese*




















*he sings in a robotic-way, match his costume*















*with a black guardian dog*















*how much is that doggie in the window "arf-arf" (dog's barking)*

Yes, the dog can sing along with him =)


These two below are not musician.. But, I seriously have no idea what to call them. I still find them pretty interesting though. Why? Because I couldn't get to see something like these in Indo, God damn it!




















*what should I call her/him? (yeah, I forgot this person's gender..shame on me) Melbourne-street-painter?*




















*common in Europe. But I only saw her once or twice during my stay in Melb*















*street-chess.. The guy on the right from viewer's side, I like the way he stands...LOL*


Now, places. These are the views that I usually seen on my way to school/work place..and on my way back home.




















*chinatown. In every countries I've ever visited, there's always A CHINATOWN*















*the comedy festival was held there*




















*I think it's beautiful*















*flower-shop.. the flowers, the lightning and the couple makes me go HALLELUJAH!!!!*


This is the last travel place I went to..















*Mt. Buller*















*cute guys at Mt.Buller.. Hei, I DO miss cute guys too!*


Now, the view outside my bedroom window..




















*evening.. the opposite building is Flinders Station*















*at night... there were fireworks playing on Federation Square*


If I ever get the chance to revisit Melbourne, either as a student or a tourist, I would make sure that I get to ride in this horse and carriage, pay a visit to Rialto Tower and Old Melbourne Goal (the old prison).. *Pengeeeen!!! Sigh*















*elegant horses carriage*

Lastly, the most beautiful fireworks I've ever seen. At that time, this stupid blogger didn't know how to maximize her Sony T50 use! So, the pictures turned out blur and hence they don't do justice to the awesome fireworks.




















*maroonish*




















*yellowish-pinkish dots*




















*sparkling*















*and there she was*


Enough! I still have so many pictures.. But, this post is already a bit too long and the time is a bit too late.

I still miss Melbourne.. But, I feel a lot better. Maybe that's what photos are for. To ease the pain of missing something and so that we could vividly remember the precious memories we have. Reminiscing the past.

~Rain and tears.. does it sound familiar?~

~Third times and still enjoying it~















*kuda2*

Today, I watched it for the third times...and me loving it even more =)

~Do you really think, even for a minute, you stood a chance?~

~Google's Secrets~

Google is one of the many websites I open almost every time I go online.

Trus, pas lg jalan2 ke blognya miund.com, gue baru tau kalo website google tuch ada rahasia- rahasianya...

Nich 7 rahasia - rahasia Google =

1. Type kata "googoth" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky" ("Saya Lagi Beruntung"). Maka lo bisa ngeliat tampilan Google dalam versi gothic.

2. Type kata "ewmew fudd" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", maka lo bisa ngeliat tampilan Google dengan text versi si Elmer Fudd nya Warner Bros *ooh..I'm Feewing Wucky*

3. Type kata "xx-klingon" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", bakal muncul tampilan Google dengan text versi bahasa Klingon *apa artinya googledaq ylnej? hehe*

4. Type kata "google bsd" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", di tampilan Google yg baru logonya bakal berubah jadi seperti ini...







*bsd*


5. Type kata "google linux" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", logo Google di tampilan yg baru akan jadi kaya gini..








*linux*

6. Yang ini gue taunya dr org yg ngasi komen di blog miund.com. Coba dech type "xx-hacker" di kotak text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", bakal muncul tampilan Google dengan versi text yg rada2 numeric gitu.. *contoh : EyE Am ph33l1n6 lu(ky*


Now, the last and the most interesting one is....
7. Type "google easter egg" di kotal text en klik "I'm Feeling Lucky", maka di tampilan baru logonya bakal jadi seperti ini..






*easter eggs*

DAN bakal ada game nangkep2 telur paskah di mana lo bisa gerakkin kelinci yg bawa keranjang buat nangkepin telur2 paskah sehingga ngebentuk kata "google" =)


~My jar is still getting low. I must, again, say goodbye. Bye bye!~

~The Forbidden Kingdom~

So happpyyyyyy... !!!
Well, I just got home after watching The Forbidden Kingdom at Surabaya Town Square with my parents and younger brother..
This was the second time I watched this movie.




















~one of my favorite movies~

I heart Jackie Chan and I love every single movies where he played a role. The same goes to Jet Li.. Seems like I couldn't get enough of their fights =)
I read it somewhere that this is the first American-made film where Jackie hasn't choreographed himself. Never mind, it still turns out good though.

Basically, the story is about Jason (played by an ang-moh actor, Michael Angarano) who is obsessed with martial arts movies, being beaten up by a bully. This bully has just shot an elderly Chinese man. Jason, holding an ancient Chinese stick, runs and falls down from a roof before he magically transported to an ancient China. He, then, met Lu Yan (Jackie) who told him about the legend of the Monkey King. Apparantely, Monkey King (Jet Li) needs the staff that possesses by Jason in order to get back his power. Jason is schooled in kung-fu by Lu Yan and the Silent Monk (Jet Li). He is also accompanied by the fierce yet lovely Sparrow (Liu Yifei). Afterwards, these four journey to the Temple of the Five Elements.... and you should go and watch the rest of the story yourself.

Regardless many people said that The Forbidden Kingdom is a movie for kids as there are many special effects, magic and time-travel, I still think this movie is perfectly fine. I was not surprised when I found out from a newspaper that this movie lands No.1 at weekend box office with an estimated $20.9 M in ticket sales (gue baca Jawa Pos)

3 reasons why I think this movie is worth my time and money (and worth yours too) =

1. I am a big fan of Jackie Chan




















~the drunken immortal~

According to Wikipedia.. Jackie is an actor, action choreographer, film director, producer, martial artist, comedian, screenwriter, singer and stunt performer. Above all, he still looks good in his 54th...what a man =)


2
. So am I a big fan of Jet Li














~cool Silent Monk~

He is supposedly retired from martial arts epics, but still looks great and has fun with his dual roles. Jet Li was wushu world championship for several times... *again* what a man (^_^)


3. This is the first-ever pairing of martial arts legends JACKIE CHAN and JET LI















~ the monk and the drunken master~

Martial arts legends occupying the same screen, itself, made the money's worth!


Okay, being a normal girl, I love to see a charismatic man whenever I watch a movie. So, two very charismatic men in the same movie never fail to satisfy me..


















~both are damn successfull international film stars~

I wanna give them hugs hugs o('-'o)



(note : for those who haven't watched this.. KASIAAAN DECH LOE..ahahaha)



Finally, like what Lu Yan said in the movie.........

~My jar is getting low. I must say goodbye. Bye bye!~

~What a Damned Day~

Beteeee!!! I would never consider TODAY as one of my "GREAT DAYS"..not even "GOOD DAYS"..

Perhaps one of the worst negative effects of lack-of-sleep is you'll be extra-sensitive! Or is it just me who feel that way?

For some ridiculously unimportant reasons including went back home late, continued by taking a bloody long time for internet surfing plus downloading an equal unimportant movie, followed by some could-be-saved-for-another-time chats with my brother..hence, I didn't sleep the whole night. *Blame me for I was so stupid it even makes a child with autism look smart*

Furthermore, already in a bad mood I was, I accidentally started a conversation about the topic I hate the most. I hate it to the core!

Every single time we brought that topic up, we would end up being fed up with each other *up up up there it goes*
No matter how we try to talk about it, no matter how calm we are at the first place...it'll end up in the same way..a bad one. Especially now, when my mood is swinging to the "bad" side..argh!

Let me choose how I wanna live my life. Let me be the decision maker of my very own life! At the end of the day, I am the one who's living it!

Before you speak out your opinions, please try to put yourself in my shoes. Imagine how you gonna feel if you were me? If you think that you wouldn't like it.. Then, same here! I would not and will never like it either. To cut things short, I will never agree with the 2 opinions of yours. I would say no to changing course, and so is next year thingy. That's it. *I think I've made my point clear*

(note : just now when i felt like crying, gue kebelet pipis.. abis itu pas lg dgn tenangnya pipis di toilet.. I saw that baby lizard jumped from the front-toilet-seat to my shorts! Holy-Mother-Mary...I screamed in horror and called my maid but she never came *lucky she did not come*. Bayangin kl gue ga tau ada anak cecak loncat ke celana en gue langsung make aja tuch celana..aaargh!! Tapi, thanks buat anak cecak yg skarang uda mati dipukul ama pembantu gue.. At least, now I don't feel like crying anymore.. Once again, thanks for your shocking surprised baby lizard...ooooohhhh)

~Geez, I need to sleep~


~ The Right Time to Piss Me Off~

These are several things that really piss me off =

1. ~Orang yg uda salah tapi ga mau minta maaf~
Kalo udah salah ama orang, ya apa susahnya sich MINTA MAAF? Baru dilanjutin ama penjelasan panjang lebar why u did what u did!
Daripada uda salah, malah sibuk nyari alasan untuk ngebela diri.. nyebelin banget kali! Mending kalo alasannya tuch masuk akal! Nah ini, kentara banget kalo dia lg bohong..dah gt GA MINTA MAAF SAMA SKALI! *yes! Menurut gue kata "maaf" itu penting!*

2. ~Late~
Honestly, gue jg sering telat kalo janjian ama orang. Misalnya janjian ketemuan di mana gt atau waktu mau dijemput, si penjemput udah nyampe di depan rumah, gue masi blm selesai siap2. Gue tau itu nyebelin banget! En gue tau gue salah (note : tiap telat gue blg sorry!). Tapi, gue sebel banget ama orang yg kalo janjian telatnya ga kira2! Janjiannya siang datengnya sore! Janjiannya sore datengnya malam! Apalagi kalo gue mesti nunggu si-telat-dateng/si-telat-jemput ampe kaya orang bego! *contoh = bediri2 ga jelas di satu tempat...arrghhh!!!* Trus yach, kalo bilang bakal udah nyampe/jemput dlm waktu setengah jam lg, PLEASE NGABARIN DI MANA EN KENAPA lo blum nyampe2/jemput2 jg padahal waktu setengah jam itu uda lewat,lamaaaa!! Jgn mesti disms/ditelp dulu baru mau ngabarin! Kl kaya gt sich, I PREFERRED TO SUDDENLY CANCEL THAT APPOINTMENT! *just so u felt as irritated as i felt*

3.~Naksirnya (terlalu) Maksa~
Hak setiap orang buat ngaku ke orang yg dia suka kalo dia ada rasa ama tuch orang. Tapi, hak setiap orang jg buat nolak/nerima orang yg nyatain suka ma dia. I don't know about others, tapi gue ga suka ama orang yg ngaku kalo dia suka gue, trus gue dah ngaku secara baek2 kalo gue ga suka dia... THEN, SI COWO-GA-JELAS ini trus2an ngomong suka! DUGH! Ampe lama kelamaan, yg tadinya mau nolak (lg en lg en lg) secara halus akhirnya mau ga mau mesti nolak secara kasar juga.. En akhirnya, I think it works =)
Abis ditolak dgn kata2 yg (menurut gue) cukup kasar, si cowo yg sepertinya uda kesindir egonya itu, mulai pretended to like someone else! Di bulletin boardnya dia PURA2 naksir ama cewe laen en dgn bodohnya mendeskripsikan appearence en keberadaan si cewe. *I think it's funny! To be frank, itu cuma ngebuat lo keliatan bego! En jgn dikira gue ga tauuu akal2an kaya gitu..ahahahahahak*


Udah dech, tiga dulu...soalnya itu doank sich yg kejadiannya recently happened. O yach, as I said in my friendster profile that I am "easy to forgive people". Banyaaaak banget momen2 di mana gue bisa consider smua hal2 di atas.. Waktu-waktu di mana gue bisa nyoba ngerti'in why they did what they did en slalu mikir "ya udah lha gpp..cuma gt doank..cuekin aja" en that's it.
*paling jg cuma gue sindir2 dikit*.

Tapi, ada 1 moment di mana gue GA BISA TOLERATE SUCH THINGS!
- THE MOMENT WHERE I GONNA SAY/DO SOMETHING TO PURPOSELY HURT U!
- THE MOMENT WHERE MY "PATIENT" IS AS LOW AS SEA WATER WHEN IT IS IN A LOW-TIDE.
One moment where I think one (or more) level/s beyond logic...and I feel 100 levels above emotions!!!

Hence, the right time to piss me off is when I'm having my period!


(NB : nah now u and u and u know why gue kmaren pas di GM tuch "baek banget" ama kalian..hohoho)


~I shall stop my ramblings now, my stomach hurts..*ouch*~

~Maze Thought~

"How we got in this situation?
All I see is ruin and devastation.
Is there any other reason why we stay instead of leaving?"

~Ternyata emosi emang bener2 bisa ngalahin logika~


~Exercise.. needed or no?~

(blog ini dipersembahkan buat org2 yg bernasib sama seperti gue, having-too-much-fat-in-his/her-body-until-people-wouldn't-be-able-to-
differentiate-
between-you-and-a-round-balloon).

I was wondering whether exercise is needed or not if u really wanna lose weight.. *and i wish it's not needed..haha*

Until I found out from a magazine (Gogirl! tentunya) that one sign of anorexic is "olahraga berlebihan, bahkan pada saat dia udah ga makan berhari2".

Oh great!!! Even if you wanna be an ANOREXIC *yea, if you are really THAT stupid*, exercise is still necessary..!! Sinting!!

And according to this website, http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080315025928AAC1d01,
You can lose weight without exercising, but the result will be damn slow *so slow i might get old before i could reach my target weight*

It happened to me before. Way back when I was still in Melbourne, I went on a diet which my food intake consisted only fruits, water and honey! Not forgetting, chocolates.
The only day I allowed myself to eat a proper food was either Saturday or Sunday (or on those times when I went out with my friends, in order not to look weird, I did order some food. But, those hang out times were usually held on Saturday too..so,it's pretty much the same).
It went for about 1 month, and as long as I could remember, I only lost 2 or 3 KG.. *what the %$#@#*!!!!
After that, I ate normally (but, I still WATCHED what I ate..!). Then, I gained back all those 2 or 3 KG.. Tell you what, I couldn't be more HAPPIER!! *sarcastically!*
You think that's enough and I dumped that idea straight away? Hahahaha.. I DID NOT! In fact, I changed it...I went for drink-only-diet. But, of course I couldn't take it! Not for a long run!

What? You think it was because I included chocolates on my diet plan?? Let see this...














*yeah, exactly the same size with the same amount I used to eat each day during those fruits-only-diet, and I dare you to prove me that those chocolates have calories higher than a bowl/a plate of rice with complete dishes you have 2 times a day on a daily basis!*

O yach, orang anorexia aja GA MAKAN paling dikit 2 bulan lebi baru bisa jd sakit kaya gt.

In conclusion, if you wanna lose weight, exercise is strongly needed (bahkan CELEBRITIES/MODELS aja dapetin body mereka dr hasil exercise). Ga bisa kalo cuma jaga makan doank..kecuali lo uda sampe di berat ideal en cuma mau maintain your current weight *seriously*

It's not easy. But, if it's easy... nobody's gonna be fat though =)

*ps : bersyukur dech org2 yg bs makan banyak tp bodynya tetep bagus! BENER2 BERSYUKUR DECH KALIAN..AHAHAHAHA*

~No Pain, No Gain... You wanna lose weight, tapi ga mau CAPE2 olahraga.. Good luck then~

(good luck for myself too..*sigh*)

~Stupid Cupid~




















*stickgal.com~


See? It's not me being too choosy, "don't wanna open my heart" or have a too high expectation..

Blame it on Cupid instead, for he's being so lousy..mwahahaha..

~Realization~

I wrote a damn long entry and decided not to publish it in the end because it's pretty personal matters. And I guess, some things are better left unsaid.

"Sesuai moto Ibu Kartini "Aku mau...", aku pengen ngajak kamu semua untuk berani berjuang untuk cita-cita kamu. So what do you want? Kamu pengen sekolah di luar negeri, punya usaha sendiri atau lulus dengan nilai memuaskan? Fight for it!" -quoted from Gogirl-

"I'm going back to Chicago. I'm gonna get my PH.D. I'm gonna spend the rest of my life writing books and somewhere along the line I'll meet a guy who's ....." -roughly quoted from Fool's Gold movie-

I think I should go for what I want. It may be an egoist decision.. Thinking about other people is important, apalagi kalo orang2 itu adalah orang2 yg penting/deket buat kamu. But, on the other side, gue rasa ga ada salahnya kalo sekali2 kita lebi mikirin kepentingan en kebaikkan buat diri sendiri..apalagi kalo itu dah menyangkut masa depan. I choose how I wanna live, what I wanna be and I'll fight for it.

But, by fighting for it..I need to sacrifice some people whom I heart deeply *sigh*

On a lighter note, I love Gogirl! magazine! Love it so much it's the only magazine yg gue beli secara rutin..haha


*I wish it could be THAT easy.. I wish I could be one level more egoist than what I already am. Just one level above..*

~Work Hard Play Hard = Google~

Seperti biasa, hampir tiap hari kalo lg online, website2 yg selalu gue buka tuch Friendster, Google, Youtube, The Free Dictionary ama Kaskus.. (en blog gue sendiri tentunya..mwahaha).



En today, this is what i found waktu buka Kaskus..and it makes me go "WOW!!!".















*kantornya Google.. yg ini di US ato UK gt dech*





















*kalo ini bangunan kantornya*



Trus, the next few photos which I'm about to upload below are the facilities provided by the company for their employees..
And foto2 itu bakal nunjukkin arti sebenarnya dari slogan WORK HARD PLAY HARD!
















*pool tables*
















*yea, mereka maen game di kantor..en ini fasilitas dr kantor!*














*they are allowed to bring pets*




















*free laundry*














*free food en yg masak tuch koki2 sekelas hotel bintang 5*















*free chocolates/sweets*














*gmn yach rasanya kerja sambil duduk2 di kursi gantung..*















*ato di dalem sini..*















*unique place for having a discussion*
















*messaging chairs!!!*














*they can go down from upstairs to downstairs by pool...*















*or by slide*

Slaen itu, kantor Google juga nyediain free doctors, free fitness centre, a barber shop, car wash, volley ball court, THE COMPANY EVEN GIVE YOU $5.000 IF YOU WANNA BUY A HYBRID!
And what Google have in return? EMPLOYEES TREMENDOUS LOYALTY AND PRODUCTIVITY! *pinter juga..dgn2 pekerja2 pinter en setia kaya gt, pantes google kaya!*

No wonder they say that GOOGLE IS THE BEST EMPLOYER IN AMERICA!!!
Nich link video wawancara ama pegawai2 google, jg sebagian aktifitas mereka di sana..

http://www.youtube.com/v/7gsvoROqfFU


So, anyone interested working at Google company?
Make sure you are damn good in IT! Kabarnya, orang2 yg kerja di sana tuch uda kaya "dewa2 IT" gt. Besides, Google received like 3000 applications A DAY from people who wanna work there.
















*Google*

~There you are~

There was once I thought that I got over you..
That my crush for you has gone..

Not long ago, you came back into my life so innocently..
There you are, staying in my heart..

And there I am, back to the start..
Whenever my phone beeps, I wish it's from you..
Wherever I hang out, I hope we'll spot each other..
At the same place, same time..

Sadly, I know it won't be long..
It's either you'll leave me..
Or I'll leave you..
And life goes on..

~Sebagian orang cuma cocok buat dijadiin gebetan, en ngga lebi..~

~I'm Lost (Not in Translation)~

Oh my God!
There it goes again... I have, oh I NEED, to choose which course I wanna take for my bachelor degree. This thing have been running in my mind for quite a while. It can be pretty depressing if u have so many options and you can only choose one. To make it worse, my decision now will affect my future.. like my ENTIRE FUTURE depends on this crucial decision!

Sebelumnya gue jg uda perna ngalamin situasi kaya gini. Waktu gue mesti mutusin mau lanjut SMP 2 di Banjar ato ke Sby, mau lanjut SMA di Sby ato ke Singapore (en di sini, gue ngebuat keputusan yg rada bego. Gue daftar di SMA St.Maria en keterima, trus gue buang2 uang buat bayar uang pangkal sgala padahal gue lanjutnya malah ke Spore..tau gt kan gue ga usa bayar uang pangkalnya!! malah ga murah lagee..sial). Trus waktu uda lulus di Spore, gue mesti mutusin mau lanjut di negara mana..uni apa..en course apa yg gue mau.
This situation, it made/makes me confuse. *so confusing that it makes Confucius confused*
It seems like i lost direction in life..

These are the two options i currently have =
1. Go back to Melbourne and take Bachelor of Business Management
2. Go to Singapore and take Bachelor of Hospitality and Tourism Management
*i have no interest in other courses beside the ones I've mentioned above*

For me, time is crucial and financial does matter. So, i wanna finish my degree as fast as possible. No matter what it takes.

For the 1st option, I can get my degree in 2 or 1.5 years time (I already have my Diploma of Business Management). But, i really have no idea what i gonna do after that. It seems like i have no interest in working in business related fields, except to set up my own business and hence the degree will go down the drain.

So, i think I'll go with the 2nd option which is hotel management. I've been accepted in 2 private universities in Singapore. It will take 2.5 years for me to finish the course. Furthermore, studying in hotel management seems fun and from what my friends told me before, you'll learn a lot from it, including culinary and all. Besides, kayanya kerja di hotel lebi enak..apalagi tourism di Singapore jg berprospek gede yg berarti lapangan kerjanya jg banyak. *turis2 indo aja banyak banget yg ke sana tiap bulan juni ama desember..biasa, it's the BIG SALE that attracts GIRLS/WOMEN*
Somemore, kenapa yach akhir2 ini gue jd pengen kerja di cruise?

Tapi, seperti yg uda kita tau, private universities di Singapore itu KATANYA sich ga gt bagus. Apalagi kalo lo ngambil business and accountancy, science, communication studies, art, design & media atau engineering di private universities..itu sama aja kaya buang2 uang en toh bakal dianggap ga pinter (makanya ga bisa masuk government universities kaya NTU, NUS en SMU..padahal they provide those courses juga gt lho) *uda jadi rahasia umum dech kayanya*

To be honest, gue rada ga sreg/gengsi jg sich masuk private uni di Spore. Cuma, local universities mana yg nyedia'in perhotelan?????!!! sial sial sial!!!
NTU emang ada, tapi itu kan cuma ampe advanced diploma! en gue maunya bachelor!!! Sedangkan untuk ngambil perhotelan di Swiss..oh well, bukannya gue da bilang financial does matter? Jadi gimana doooonk??? *oh gengsi gengsi..lama2 gue mati makan gengsi*

Lastly, abis dipikir2 lagi lagi en lagi...en abis gue nulis blog ini sambil mikir mikir en mikir.
Kayanya gue bakal ngambil perhotelan aja dech di EASB, Singapore. Trus kalo bisa sich skalian aja magang di sana en abis tu kerja di sana *AMEN*

*NOTES = Why did I talk about this? Because I have nothing better to blog about..ahahaha*

~Gue ga mau ambil perhotelan di Petra bukan karena ga mau kuliah di indo tapi karena kuliahnya lama banget! 4 ampe 5 taon gila! En seandainya Ciputra bisa ngasi perhotelan dengan course duration cuma 3 taonan trus bisa magang di luar..I'll consider to study here~

~Gym, Determination..Uoooogh!~

Buat sebagian orang, termasuk beberapa dr temen2 gue, it's impossible for them to gain weight no matter how much amount of food they eat every single day *contoh = Fanny "biak" di mudika, Juwita "margie" en Cindy "yg skarang kul di Melb"*.

Buat beberapa orang yg laen, mereka bisa menggendut sampe batasan tertentu..and then, that's it. Makan makan makan, paling naeknya dikit. Udah gt, kalo mau dikurusin lg, they just need to cut down a bit of their regular-size meal and there it comes..their ideal normal body is back, en mereka ga butuh waktu lama buat itu! *contoh lagi = kalo ga salah ce Jussy gitu dech*

Unfortunate for me, jadi gendut itu gampang! Bahkan saking gampangnya, menggendut buat gue itu uda seperti BAKAT....

So, i NEED to do something about it.. or else, I'll end up being obese.

Mungkin kalian pikir gue berlebihan, hiperbola ato being exaggerating. But, I'm not.
You might say that I'm not fat but chubby. Thank you..
For your information, gue tau bedanya "FAT" sama "CHUBBY"...and I know that I'm not "FAT" yet. But the fact that I'm gaining weight still bothering me.

I am concern about my appearance and how people look at me. To be honest, sedikit banyak I lose my confidence tiap kali gue tau kalo berat badan gue naek. You might think I am shallow, tapi cewe mana sich yg BENER2 ngerasa tetep OK kalo tau berat badannya naek mulu? 1:100 I would say. And I'm not that type of person who can accepts the fact that "I am beautiful though I am fat". I need to do something.

I wanna do this for my own sake. To stay healthy and boost my confidence. Bukan buat orang laen, karena toh gue tau kalo gue ga bakal kehilangan temen cuma karena gue ga kurus en I don't want a boyfriend who likes me only for my appearance =)

So, I wanna lose more weight this month because I think I've gained a considerable amount of weight on March *sigh*


~I want a firm body, not a thin one~